This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
