I only kidnapped one of them. chill
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
