singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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