You're my little dorito
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
