Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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