Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
