yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
