Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
