Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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