why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
