I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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