So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
