yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I need to sanitize my soul.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
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