we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
