My nipple is on Facebook.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize