I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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