I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
