you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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