KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
