I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
