YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
PS: I just woke up from my shower
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
