Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
