i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
