And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
