Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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