I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
