I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
