is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
