Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Your penis caused this!
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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