He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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