she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
