rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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