Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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