u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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