I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Randomize
