Grow some girl-balls and come out already
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize