yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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