how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
