I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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