So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
