and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
