She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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