I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
