We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
