Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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