Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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