My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
