Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
