i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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