that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
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